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10 April 2007

The Depression of Mony

Mony is depressed!

Why, you may wonder. Why does he have to be depressed? u may well ask. The more creative of you may link his depression to the fact that he is going to get married. And a few will agree that if he is depressed because he is going to get married he has every reason to be.

After all, doesn't a guy lose his freedom after tying the knot?

No sir, there are not the reasons for the sudden lowering of his spirits. No way.

So we come back to the moot q. Y is he depressed?

During one of his relatively gregarious moments he told me the reason.

The whole thing (Mony said) started in circa 1997. During one of his rare, occasional (it was so rare!!) visits to the library, he was going through one of those news magazines that are dime a dozen. Suddenly he came across an article on "Monsoon and it s effect on Clothes" (about clothes getting wet and dirty in rain). The author's name sounded familiar. it was written by C.Y.Gopinath.

Yeah, our Gopi. Raji Athai's son. Our cousin.

Mony says that he was proud of Gopi. He was proud of our family. He was so proud that he took a photocopy of that article to show off to his friends.

I won't blame him if in his enthusiasm, he failed to realise that the topic of rain water on clothes is not one which will make people shout with joy. Had he realized also he would not have minded.

He was in cloud 26 if you see what I mean.

The next time he went to the library was in September 1998. (told u it was rare). Browsing thru one men's magazine (u know the kind. One which will give you advice on how a man should walk under hot sun with a girl clinging onto his arm like a leech or something) he came across an article on husband doing household chores while wife has gone for work. The tenor was amusing.

Mony says that he was trying to be amused till he saw the author's name. yes, it was written by C.Y.Gopinath.

From then onwards a nameless fear started affecting Mony any time he looked at a news magazine. His rare visits to the library became rarer. He revoked all his magazine subscriptions. he became an avid reader of magazines like Chip, Computer's today and PC Quest. there also he was apprehending and article by C.Y.Gopinath on "Why intelligent man do not require a computer to do a mathematical calculation".

He felt persecuted and stalked, if you get my drift.

The thing came to a climax in Jan1, 1999. Opening his daily news paper (the only thing which he felt will be without the malevolent influence of Gopi's literary skills and hence he read) what else should he find but an article on "100 ways to celebrate a new year's day" by none other than Gopi.

That was when he started making plans of taking up a job in US of A.

He felt that India was no longer safe for the scions of VVR family. What with Gopi stalking him relentlessly, he felt that the farther he is from Indian Magazines, the better for him.

He got his passport made. He applied to his organization for transfer to the farthest possible corners of America. He decided to get married.

Everything going hanky dory, you may say.

They were, till he checked Shoba Narayan in Google. To his horror he found that hidden from him Shoba was spreading her 'culirary' (culinary + literary) influence in the far corners of US of A. Now a miasma of hopelessness has covered him like snow in the himalayas. He feels that the world is not safe for the scions of the family. The tentacles of literature has spread to the vital innards of the family. If it is not Gopi, it is Shoba. The family has a lot to say and they believe in telling it.

The other day, I saw him going through the map of Alaska and Ethiopia!!

Now u know why he is depressed. He has every reason to be, won't you say?

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