Life Secret 5: Give more than you take

I recommend that you read the following posts before you read this one

The five secrets you must discover in your life

Life Secret 1: Be true to yourself

Life Secret 2: Leave no regrets

Life Secret 3: Become love

Life Secret 4: Live the moment

As we live our life we realize that what matters in the end is what we leave behind, our legacy. One of the wise men in the book ('The five secrets you must discover before you die' - John Izzo) talks of the difference between a '10 Minute Funeral' and a '10 Hour Funeral'. Some people live lives that touch so many people in a positive way that people just want to hang around and talk about that person's life. Others live a more self-focused life. You should live your life as if you want a 10 hour funeral.

The author talks about Victor Frankl, a Jewish Psychotherapist, who was a prisoner in Nazi concentration camps from 1942-45. Dr.Frankl later wrote about his experiences in 'Man's search for ultimate meaning'. One of the most important sections in this book deals with the issue of suicide.

Many prisoners in the camp contemplated suicide. Frankl noticed that you could not convince someone to stay alive by telling him that he was going to get something from the world, that some happiness awaited him in the future. However, if you could help a person see that the world expected something of him, that there was some good that he could do in his lifetime, he would almost always choose life. Frankl concluded that people who know 'what the world expects of them will never throw their life away'

What a powerful perspective....

One of the reasons why 'giving more than we take' is one of the secrets to happiness is that we have a great deal of control over what we give. Each day we have the power to give without limit. We can choose kindness, to serve, to love, to be generous...

During his interviews the author found that what all the wise people had in common was the knowledge that all of the mare connected to something larger than them. For some it was belief in god. For others, it was a belief in being connected to the entire human journey (that which comes before us and after us), and for some others a strong sense that there was a great mystery to which we are connected as human beings. In all cases, at the heart of this connection was the importance of being of service and of being charitable.

According to the author, there are two great tasks of human life. To find ourselves and to lose ourselves. We find ourselves by discovering our destiny and being true to ourselves. Yet it is not enough to find ourselves, we must also lose ourselves.

The loss of self is about seeing that we are connected to something much larger, something that had life before us and that will have a life after us. We must understand that 'Self' do not have any significance on its own. We are significant because we are a part of a larger entity. The author observed that those who found themselves and lost themselves attained happiness.

There is no better way to lose ourselves than to dedicate our life to giving, to leaving the world a better place than we found it. This connects us to the future and links us to the past.

One of the concepts that the author brings out is that we live in the 'Borrowed' world. Each generation borrows the world from the previous generation and holds it in trust for the next generation. The wise people realize that happiness comes from both giving and a deep sense of responsibility to the future.

Just as individuals find happiness throught thir connection to furute, an entire society must live by the fifth secret. The more selfish a society becomes, the more it loses its vitality

The questions related to the fifth secret are:

1. Did I make the world a better place this week in some small way?

2. Did I remind myself this week that I am making a difference even if I don't see it?

3. Was I kind, generous and giving this week? How do I want to be more that way tomorrow / next week?

4. Was I focused on the needs of the 'Small Self' this week (the pursuit of things status or power) rather than the 'Large self' (which is my contribution to making world a better place)?

Wish all my readers a purposeful life !!!

Life Secret 4: Live the moment

I recommend that you read the following posts before you read this one.

The five secrets you must discover in your life

Life Secret 1: Be true to yourself

Life Secret 2: Leave no regrets

Life Secret 3: Become love

'Live the moment' means to live fully our lives without judging ourselves or without focusing on the past or the future. It is to enjoy each moment and live with gratitude and purpose. It means to see each of our living moments as a gift.

In his book 'Power of Now', Eckhart Tolle talks about people living in different times. A very few people focus on living 'Now', which is the 'Physical Time'. Most of the people live most of their lives either in the past, 'It could have been, I could have..., I should have...' etc, or in future, 'I am going to do..., we will see' etc. Mr.Tolle calls these time 'Psychological time'. Ideally people should spend most of their lives in the physical time, but unfortunately it doesn't happen that way for many people and they end up living their lives in the psychological time.

Coming back to this book, in the words of one of the wise men, 'Live the moment' means to banish the word BORING from our vocabulary and take in all that every moment has to offer. Seneca, Roman Philosopher says, 'We should live each day as a separate life'. Each day is not a step on the way to destination, it is the destination. We begin to 'Live the moment' when we recognize that each day is a gift and not ruin it by living in the past or the future. There is a difference between 'Living our lives' and 'Planning our lives'. We should not be 'Getting through life' in the hope that we will become happy IF or that we will be happy WHEN.

Present moment is the only moment that we have any control on. We have no power to change the past. We have no control on what we will face in future. Of course we can plan and take action NOW to turn our future in a direction that we desire. But planning and taking action NOW is a part of 'Living NOW in the moment'.

To practice living in the moment, we must train and discipline our minds. Meditation can be used to train our minds to focus on the present.

An average human being has about 40-60000 thoughts a day. Since thoughts shape who we are, it is important for us to put in positive thoughts to get the best results. 

Living in the moment means choosing to be in a place of gratitude. Of being thankful for what we have and not focus on what we do not have. 

Here are the questions to ponder as we live the moment.

1. Did I fully enjoy what I was doing this day / week? Was I really 'here' or did I just show up?

2. Did I take every pleasure that was available to me today / this week. Did I walk with awareness through my life or did I just run?

3. What am I grateful for about today / this week? Did I find myself saying 'I would be happy if..."? Did I choose contentment and happiness this wee?

4. Did I live in the present today / this week? Did I let tomorrow steal the day's happiness?

Wish all my readers a purposeful life !!!

Life Secret 3: Become Love

I recommend that you read the following three posts before you reading this one.

Five secrets you must discover in this life

Life Secret 1: Be true to yourself

Life Secret 2: Leave no regrets

To become love is to become a loving person. we can live out this secret in three ways.

• Choose to love ourselves
• Choose to act with love to those closest to us
• Choose to become love in all our interactions

The part of loving ourselves start with seeing ourselves as being worthy of love. For some of us it comes naturally due to our loved upbringing, but for others it is difficult. The way to love ourselves is by filling our minds with positive thoughts. 

The  author talks of a story int he Navajo tradition. An old Navajo told his grandson that there is a fight going on inside him. He said that it was a fight between two wolves. One wolf is evil. It is the wolf of anger, resentment, envy, sorrow, greed and all other negative thought and feelings. The other wolf is good. It is the wolf of joy, peace, love, hope, humility and all the good thoughts and feelings. The grandson asked, " Grandpa, which wolf wins the fight?" Grandfather replied, " the wolf that wins is the wolf that I chose to feed".

So feed the good wolf in you.

The second part of becoming love is about making love a priority. Many people ignore those around them in their quest for success in their careers. Learn to treat those you love with a lot of respect.

It is not easy to do that. A study shows that in an average family the ration of negative messages to positive messages is 14 to 1. The same study found that in a long-term, healthy marriage, the same ratio is 1 to 7. 

The questions on becoming love are:

1. Did I make room for friends , family and relationship today / this week? Did I allow things to be more important than people?

2. Was I kind and loving today / this week to people closest to me? How do I want to be more loving to them tomorrow or this week?

3. Did I spread love and kindness in the world today / this week in each interaction? Did I act as if each stranger was someone for whom I could make a difference?

4. Which of my wolves did I feed today / this week? Did I spent time with people who lift my spirits Did I act with love towards myself today / this week? Did I engage in negative self-talk? Am I planting flowers or weeds in my self-conscious mind?

Wish all my readers a purposeful life !!!

Life Secret 2: Leave no regrets

You must read the following posts before you read this post

Five secrets you must discover in this life

Life Secret 1: Be true to yourself

Having no regrets means to move towards what we want rather than move away from what we fear. Regret is generated in the process of NOT taking sufficient risks for the fear of failure. Paradoxically we can guarantee failure merely by choosing not to try at all. 

To lead a life of no regret we must take more risks. The trick is to take more risks in the direction of what we want. How can we do that? How can we ensure that we take risks in the direction of what we want?

The approach followed by Elsa, a 70 year old woman, who, when faced with a risk will weigh the largest good outcome and the worst possible outcome that she can face when she takes the risk. She will take the risk if the largest positive outcome outweigh the worst possible outcome and she felt confident that she can handle the worst possible outcome.

As per a well known spiritual guru, we must 'chose the path that makes the best story'. 

We must try for things that we want in our lives because we wont regret trying and failing. Also as interviews with a number of wise people show, many of the regrets in life relate to people in our lives, to the issues not resolved, to words not spoken or to the broken relationship not healed.

Having said the above, it is also important to know how to handle regrets. It is important to know that in most cases we did the best we knew how to do at the time we acted. It is better to forgive ourselves and to let go. The happiest people in this book were the ones that had come to peace with their lives.

Regret also plays a positive role. The positive role played by regret is that it helps us know what is important for us and knowing that can keep us from a deeper pool of regret in future. 

Here are the questions relating to Life Secret 2: Leave no regrets

1. Did I act out of fear today or this week? How do I want to be more courageous tomorrow or next week?

2. Did I act on my convictions this week? How do I want to act on these more deeply this week?

3. What step would I take in my life right now if I were acting with courage, not fear? What might I do differently now if I were living from the perspective of an old person on the porch looking back at my life?

4. How am I responding to the setbacks in my life right now? Am I stepping forward or retreating?

Wish all my readers a purposeful life !!!

Life Secret 1: Be true to yourself

You should read THIS POST before reading this post.

As discussed in his book reviewed here, Mr.John Izzo talks of five secrets that a person must discover in his life time. The first secret is 'Be true to yourself'.

We have to be true to ourselves and live the life with intention. We have to live the life that we want to and follow our hearts. To be true to ourselves, we must choose to live our lives awake. We must continuously examine to see if our life is on target and if we are moving towards what we want. We have to continuously examine if our lives are going in the right direction and keep making corrections and adjustments on the way. 

To be true to ourselves, we must consistently and regularly ask these three critical life questions.

"Am I following my heart and being true to myself?"

"Is my life focused on things that matter to me?"

"Am I being the person that I want to be in this world?"

One of the most common ways in which we are not being true to ourselves is by inculcating the habit of 'running away from what we fear'. Most of us always try to avoid the things that we fear. In the Indian context, in search of the elusive 'Job security' we stick on to that boring government job that pay us less and satisfy us even lesser. 

Instead of 'Running away from what we fear', we should be 'Moving towards what we want'. We should identify what we want and constantly move towards that objective. 

The simplest way to be true to ourselves over a lifetime is to be true to ourselves each day. As the saying goes 'how we live our day is how we live our lives'. Do things everyday that moves us closer to what we want, our destiny. At the end of of each day, when we are tired, ask ourselves if we are 'Good Tired', having done things that we enjoyed and felt worthwhile, or we are 'Bad Tired', doing stuff that did not get us closer to our destiny.

Whether we are 'Good Tired' or 'Bad Tired' doesn't matter. What is important is that we never stop asking the above three questions to ourselves. If we keep asking these questions, we will find our answer and through that contentment.

The author gives us the following set of questions that we must think about each week.

1. Did this week / day feel like my kind of week / day? What would make tomorrow or next week fee more true?

2. Was I the kind of person that I want to be this week? In what way do I want to be more like the kind of person that I want to be tomorrow or next week?

3. Am I following my heart right now? what would it mean for me to really follow my heart right now?

4. How do I want to live this secret more deeply next week

Wish all you readers a purposeful life !!!

Personal growth and Chinese Bamboo Tree...

I love the story of Chinese Bamboo Tree....

You plant a seed and water that year after year. Nothing happens. It is as if the seed has decided to stay under the earth and not to come out and grow.

You persist.

You water it for one year, nothing

Second year, nothing still

Third and fourth year, still nada

And towards the end of fifth year, when you have all but given up, something amazing happens.

In about a time span of six weeks, the Chinese Bamboo Tree grows up to an astonishing height of 90 Feet, that is a growth of about 2 feet per day.

The five years spent under the earth was preparation for this rapid growth.

Amazing, isn't it?

I am fascinated by this story at multiple levels.

This is very similar to what happens in life. Some people are like the Bamboo Tree. Their potential remain hidden for a long time...

and then?

Wham !!!

They suddenly externalize their hidden potential. They perform extraordinary tasks. They write their books, they start their businesses...

They spent a long time hidden from the world and then over a short period of time they grow up explosively.

They are the 'late bloomers'. Einstein was one of them.

This story also means that you should plant the seeds of growth. They are called dreams. Once you have your dreams, keep adding love, affection and hope to nurture the dreams. Don't give up. Keep hoping, keep trying...

You cannot expect to achieve stuff if you do not plant the seed. And water them regularly.

You have to start dreaming. You have to start wanting something. Keep it totally focused.

Someone said, 'People always live their lives running away from what they fear. Instead they should run towards what they want'.

If you have your dreams and keep watering them you will achieve your dreams. That is for sure.

But....

Here is the thought...

What if you do not have any dreams?

There are many people who live their lives without a dream, a goal or a destination. They don't know what they want. They simply get up in the morning, go to work or whatever, come back and plop on the bed feeling what John Izzo mentions as 'Bad Tired'. The life is lived as a ritual, doing the same stuff over and over, without thinking, without reflecting, without planning....

There is not goal, no destination...

There is no seed, there is no bamboo tree.

These people may have dreams, but they fail to nurture them thereby letting them decay. 

Even scarier are those people who has very good dreams, healthy seeds, but they suppress them. They suppress their natural tendency to grow and prosper. They are aware of their potential but are not confident of following through with their potential. Their dreams are small and easily attainable. They create 'Bonsai Bamboos'. Their bamboo tree grows just tall enough. They do not have the confidence to back up their dreams. They do not respect themselves strongly enough to take themselves seriously. They suppress their growth. 

That is scary, isn't it? That you have the potential and you decide that you do not have potential. You do not have faith on your dreams, on your abilities to achieve your dreams. 

It is scary. 

30 Days, 30 Veggies: Day 5: Bhindi (Okra / Ladies Finger) Fry

Day 5 is for Lady's finger. Also known as Bhindi in Hindi idioma and 'Vendakkai' in Malayalam and Tamil.

Growing up, it was always a struggle with my mom regarding this vegetable. As per the Indian accumulated knowledge, also known as wisdom, Bhindi is good for intellect and for improving memory. Just like anything good in the world, Bhindi was relatively tasteless.

That may be because there are not many good Bhindi preparations in South India. There is the Bhindi Mezhukupurati, or Bhindi Pachadi and thats it....

When  I started tasting North Indian Bhindi preparations, my opinion about the taste of Bhindi changed. Of course it was still yucky and mushy mushy, but it turned out to be tastier than I thought. The recipe that I am describing below is my version of Bhindi Fry as prepared in North India.

Ingredients.

1. Bhindi, Slit: About two cups
2. Onion Chopped: 1/2 cup
3. Tomato Chopped: 1/2 cup
4. Jeera Powder, Coriander Powder, Haldi Powder, Red Chilly Powder: A pinch of each
5. Salt to taste
6. Oil: Two spoons.

Preparation

1. Heat the oil in a pan
2. Add the Chopped Onion and keep stirring till it is golden brown
3. Add tomatos till it mixes nicely with the onion
4. Add all the powders and saute for about three minutes, till the raw smell of the powders are replaced with the smell of masala. Also you will see the mix releasing oil
5. Add the Bhindi and mix very thoroughly. Ensure that masala is spread evenly on all the Bhindi
6. Close the pan and heat on medium flame for about 10 minutes
7. Switch off the stove and top it with Coriander Leaves

The Fry turned out to be tastier than I thought.

Benefits of Bhindi

Check out....

Book Review: The five secrets that you must discover before you die

Author: John Izzo, PhD

Once in a while you come across a book that make you look at your life in a totally different perspective. This book, 'The five secrets that you must discover before you die' by John Izzo is one such book

At the outset, the author warns us that the title of the book may be disconcerting. No one wants to think or talk about our death, but the title reminds us of our mortality and provides a level of urgency to the points mentioned in the book. The author and his colleagues interviewed more than 200 people (235 of them) in preparation for this book. All these people were recommended by their peers, relatives, friends and acquaintances as possessing extra-ordinary wisdom. Based on the extensive interviews the authors culled out a set of five key behavioral traits, called 'five secrets' and expounded on them. 

This book is as useful for a 20 year old young man as it is to a 70 year old man. The points covered are very intuitive and the book is embellished with a number of great anecdotes and experiences from their life. As an example, in the prologue to this book, we meet a middle-aged lady named Margeret who tries to live her entire life from the perspective of an 'old woman sitting on my rocking chair on the porch'. Whenever she had a decision to make, she would imaging sitting on the porch as an old woman looking back on here life. She would ask the old woman  to advice on the path she should follow...

Beautiful...

As I mentioned before, people of any age can get value and wisdom out of this book and they will come away with different perspectives. Young people would be exposed to ideas that can form guiding paths of their life. They will internalize the concepts of 'Fighting the good fight'  and to see the 'wood for the trees'. For the middle aged, this will provide tools to benchmark their lives against the five secrets. And as far as older people are concerned, they will learn to find peace in their lives. 

There are four sections to the book. The first section looks at the methodology adopted the author and his team in identifying the people who they will interview for this book. All the people, all 235 of them, were chosen by their acquaintances as the 'wisest people they knew'. The team went about conducting structured interviews with each one of them and culled out the essence of these interviews in the five secrets that they identified.

The operative part of this book are sections two and three. The section two consists of the next five chapters each of which expound on one of the five secrets. This section starts off with a chapter on 'be true to yourselves', the next chapter focuses on 'Having no regrets', the next two chapters discuss the secrets of 'becoming love' and ' Living in the moment'. 

This section rounds off with a chapter on 'Giving more than you take' from the universe.

Each chapter in this section finishes off with a set of four to five questions relating the secret covered in the chapter. Each of these questions are supposed to guide as as we follow each of the secrets.

The third section consists of a single chapter where author explains as to how one can live these secrets on a regular basis. The author provides three strategies that an individual can follow to live these secrets. In the 'Awareness and Experimentation' approach, one continuously remind self to live the key secrets as applicable to them. Another approach is the 'Goal Based' approach, where one can have a goal of living the secrets and tracking the goal achievement on a regular basis. One way in which this can be done is by asking ourselves a set of non-judgmental 'Yes/No' questions relating to some of the goals that we have set for ourselves. The third and final approach is to create a set of rituals in our lives, like daily meditation for example, that we can follow at a pre-specified time.

The final section consists of a single chapter covering some of the wisdom gained from the interviews. In this section, the wise people give advice in their own words.

In summary, the following are the five life secrets

Life Secret 1: Be true to yourself
Life Secret 2: Leave no regrets
Life Secret 3: Become Love
Life Secret 4: Live the moment
Life Secret 5: Give more than you take

(Please note: Some of these links may not work till the 20th of October)

The author points out that there are two fundamental truths to human life. The first is that we have a limited and undefined amount of time. The second is that in this undefined amount of time we are faced with unlimited number of choices on how we use this time and these choices will define our lives. He explains that the two things that human beings want are to find 'Happiness' and 'Meaning'. Happiness means, finding enjoyment and contentment in what we d. Meaning is about finding connections and linkages between your present and future.

This short book packs a lifetime of learning into one small compact book with about 8 chapters spread across 150 pages. The language is simple and easy on the mind. The examples are excellent and the concepts? What about the concepts?

There are some great concepts discussed in this book. In the section on 'Follow the heart', the author mentions that most of us live a life of avoiding what we fear rather than moving towards what we want. We should focus our lives on what we want out of our lives and relentlessly work towards achieving that goal.

Another concept is that of 'Good Tired'. At the end of the day, when we are tired, we should ask ourselves if we are 'Good Tired', tired having done something worthwhile, or 'Bad Tired', having led a dreary life the entire day. We should continually identify what is that which makes us 'Good Tired' and strive to do more of that activity on a daily basis.

As the book points out, 'How we live our day is how we live our life'.

Here are some of the approaches to living the five secrets

Highly recommended. Rating 4/5.

'None of the Above' option in election

Recently Supreme Court of India has asked the Election Commission of India to add the 'None of the Above (NOTA)' option in the Electronic Voting Machines. This will come into effects from the elections to the five states in India, scheduled later this year.

Read the news here

Even now this option is available. Currently, if you do not like any of the candidates, you can exit without voting for any of the candidates and express your displeasure in the register kept with the Election Official at the venue of the Election. There are two problems with this. Unlike Voting (showing preference) which is a secret process, rejection (Showing displeasure) is not a secret process. This means that you might end up in the bad books of all the political parties (and they have a very long memory). Also, there is no way to prevent someone from casting fake votes in your name because there is no way to block your vote even if you did not want to vote for anyone. 

People circumvent this and make their displeasure known by Voting for multiple candidates and making their votes invalid. This is a round about process.

Supreme Court addresses this anomaly by bringing the rejection also as a part of the voting process. As per the rule, if more than 50% of people in a constituency reject all the candidates, the elections will have to be redone. 

There is no doubt that this is a good measure. It gives a lot of power to the electorate, the common man. It also puts a lot of pressure on the political parties to field honest, upright and capable candidates in the election. This will ultimately be good for the country by helping to cleanse the political cesspool in the country.

Of course, the government objected to this in the Court. Review petition is still going on. Government's contention is that elections are a process of 'Selection' rather than 'Rejection'. Bringing in NOTA option will make it a process of 'Rejection'. This is not what the framers of constitution had in mind.

The government's case is weak, I think. After all the option to express displeasure with the candidates already exist. Only thing that the court has done is to formalize the option and linked this option to the ultimate result in the process.

Government will probably lose this case, 

I can see that it has a lot of good points. But still, I am uncomfortable with the decision. 

Why?

The reason is that there are two groups of voters in India with different stakes in the election. One is the rural / urban poor and the other is the urban educated, well off class. Both these groups have different emotional investments in an election. For the poor, elections have real direct consequences. For one, they are main beneficiaries of government programs and any delay caused by uncertainties due to delayed elections will impact them directly. 

These folks do a lot of analysis of the positions of various candidates before voting. They know that both of the candidates are bad but they also know what they can expect from each of them. They are very clear of their choice and thery are also clear that their choice is 'first among equally corrupt'. 

As far as the other class is concerned, the elections are more in the nature of esoteric, once in a while programs for which they get holidays. Many of them do not take the trouble of applying for election cards and even if they have the same, they do not go and vote in the elections. 'Understanding the positions of each candidate?' 'Sorry yaar, no time. I have to post in blogger and update status in FB. And what is the point? Both Congress and BJP are both sides of the same coin. I am going to reject both the parties anyway, Nothing is going to change even if any party wins. Who has the time to vote?'.

This is my worry. The NOTA process expects the electorate to invest a lot of emotional energy and personal involvement in the election process. To expect  a class - which comes out against rape when only when one of their ilk is raped, the class which demand and accept dowry and which is more invested in the next trip to US than the desultory, boring aspect of electing the people to rule them -  to understand and evaluate the nuanced positions of various political parties, come to an educated decision, go to vote and then elect or reject the candidates? I think it is too much to expect.

Well, I am an eternal optimist. I keep hoping that Rahul next door, who parties all night and boozes till cows come home, will somehow become a responsible voter and choose NOTA judiciously.

Lets hope for the best.

The good, the bad and the ugly: 14-Oct-2013

Long time since I posted on this series.

First, the Good.

Arundhati Bhattacharya has been posted as the first ever Chairperson of State Bank of India, the oldest bank in India. With this the last (may be not last, there is the RBI and the Finance Ministry) bastion of Male CEOs in India’s Financial Sector have been breached. I don’t know about Arundhati Bhattacharya as a person, but as a liberal who has the good fortune to work with many good lady Managers, I am very happy that a woman has been selected to head the largest bank in the country

It is not that India do not have Women heading the banks. We have Usha Thorat, Vice-Chairperson of RBI,  Chanda Kochhar of ICICI Bank, Shikha Sarma of Axis Bank, Kalpana Morparia of JP Morgan, Naina Lal  Kidwai of FICCI to name a few. One could almost say that Indian Banking Industry is being run by Women...

But always there was something lacking. A woman to head SBI. That would have been path-breaking.

For one SBI is the largest bank in India, other private banks are dwarfs in comparison. Also SBI impacts a large number of Indians on a  daily basis. SBI is also the oldest bank in India with more than 100 year history. Add to that the fact that SBI is a Public Sector Bank and never had a woman heading it...

Now you know why Ms.Bhattacharya’s elevation is path-breaking.

It is not just in India. Across the world you see a few women in Finance. But these are few and far between. Head of IMF, Christine Lagarde and the current nominee to head the US Fed , Janet Yellen, are both women.  Other than these, you would find it difficult to spot women at the helm of affairs of the Banking and Finance Industry across the world.

That is why so many women leading Banks in India is significant. Women bring a different perspective to Banking and Finance with focus on Prudent lending and borrowing. Women are also able to take a more longer term perspective than men.

One should give a lot of credit to KV Kamat of ICICI Bank for starting the trend of letting women take leadership role in Banking Industry. The women friendly policies of ICICI Bank are case studies in leading management institutions.

The Bad...

My heart goes out to the large number of people affected by Cyclone Phailin. This is the worst hurricane to have hit Indian coast after the disastrous hurricane in Nagapatanam that killed more than 100000 people and left swathes of land destroyed. (Did I say that I was bang in the middle of Nagapatanam, about 2 kilometers from the Sea on the day of that hurricane in 1977? I must have forgotten. May be I will write a post on that later).

Compared to the Nagapatanam hurricane, the human damages have been significantly limited this time around. This is a tribute to the better disaster management practices that we have adopted since 1977.

All of us should help the people affected. Let me check out let you know how we can help.

And the ugly...

The political climate in India, turning nastier by the day. Communal Polarization, Muzaffarnagar,  outright badmouthing....These have become the norm rather than exception. I guess this will continue till  the elections to the five states by the end of the year. 

The 'Scarce' Behavior...

What is the impact of Scarcity in our lives?

I have often heard people say that if only the poor people could changed their behavior, learn to take responsibility, learn to work hard then they won't be poor any longer...

The problem is that scarcity causes its own behavioral patterns which often prevents people from transforming their lives.

Even after people come out of Scarcity, even after they become well-off, the behavior patterns induced by Scarcity tend to continue, thereby preventing people from enjoying a more fruitful, successful life. 

I read this good article somewhere where early childhood scarcity impacts people's behavior even after they turned the corner.

I was reminded of some of this while shopping at Hypercity Super Market at Inorbit Mall, Vashi, Navi Mumbai the other day. 

I did not grow up poor. My father used to work as an Electrical Engineer with a Cement manufacturing company. Since he has to bring up a family of 6 on a meagre monthly pay, there was scarcity all around as I was growing up. 

One of the recurrent themes in our lives was regular argument between my father and mother about Horlicks. "Why buy Horlicks?", my father will ask, "Why can't the kids just drink milk?"

The 'Scarce' word was so prevalent in those days. Money was Scarce, Jobs were scarce, opportunities were scarce...

Even ideas were scarce back in those days.

Currently I work as a senior executive in a manufacturing company in Mumbai. I relocated to Mumbai from Bangalore about a year back. I stay alone. Family stays in Bangalore, since my missus is working and my son is enjoying his school.

Since I dislike going to Super Market, every time I go there, mostly to buy vegetables, I dump whatever vegetables available pay and get out of that place ASAP.

I don't look at the prices of the vegetables, since the prices are in a range that I am comfortable with. 

All these changed recently. 

As you know, over the last few months, the prices of vegetables soared in India.  What used to cost 15 bucks previously is now costing 75 bucks. This phenomenon is not just for some vegetables, the inflation is across all the vegetables. 

Now when I go to the market, my purchase behavior has changed.

Now,

-- I go to market frequently

-- I buy 250 grams where I used to buy a kilogram

-- I look at the prices before I decide to buy a vegetable

-- I buy some vegetables more than others

-- I go to the dirtier local market more than I go to the swanky hypermarkets in the mall

If a temporary scarcity can impact my behavior thus, I can imagine what a permanent scarcity can affect the behavior of individuals

The most deleterious effect of scarcity in the behaviour of people is that it limits their dreams. If you refer to my point about buying 250 grams instead of one kilogram above, you can see what I mean. I have experience of purchasing one kilogram, so once this inflation settles down, I will go back to buying one kilogram again. However, maximum quantity that a person affected by permanent scarcity will buy is 250 Grams. He can't even dream of buying one Kg of vegetables on a regular basis. He doesn't even know the 'feel' of procuring One Kg of Vegetables.

A poor person almost always ends up seeing poverty all around, for them, poverty and scarcity are normal. They can't even imagine that they could lead a a more successful life. For an unemployed poor, getting a regular pay is sufficient. For daily labourer will be satisfied with a regular monthly paycheck...

You get the gist.

As I mentioned earlier, it is not just poor people who are affected by 'Scarcity' induced behaviour. Even a well off is impacted by this behaviour and this limits the person's potential for success and his ability to monetize his potential. 

Consider this experiment.

Close your eyes and imagine that you  can get whatever you want in life. Universe will offer you anything that you ask for. (Well that is true, Universe is bountiful, but that is not my point here). What will you ask for?

You will find that with opportunity to dream for anything, most people will limit their dreams. May be you will ask for 50 Crore Retirement Kitty, may be you will ask for a Crore of Rupees per year as annual income, may be you will dream of a 3 bedroom apartment....

You are scared of even 'Dreaming' for more. If I ask you to dream of getting 10 Crores of annual income, you are uncomfortable. You think of all the problems (Tax, moochers, pesky relatives) that a 10 Crore per annum can create. 

That is what Scarcity does to you.

Let me illustrate with another example. Suppose you are a regular to investing in Stock Market. You are a Savvy investor who knows the difference between topline and bottom line or between assets and liabilities. You can read financial statements, including the fine print. You have the skills required to analyse company performance.

In your research, you have identified a dream company. It has a low price, it has huge potential, it is under-performing the market due to external factors...

It is a great buy.

The question is, 

If you have 50 lakhs to invest, how much of that would you invest in this company? 

Will you invest the entire 50 lakhs? Or you will suddenly realize that you should not put all your eggs in one basket, and diversify?

The amount that you are willing to invest shows your Scarcity factor. The more 'scarcity' minded you are, the less you will invest in this company, even when you are 'SURE' that the price of this company will double in the next one year. 

Here you are fearful of your loss. T/he focus is on loss aversion, not gain, not potential. That is Scarcity.

The converse is also true. I see many people investing in real estate because they are 'Sure' that it will double in the next one year. Even Savvy investors.

That is greed.

Greed and Fear are two sides of 'Scarcity induced behaviour'.

30 Days, 30 Veggies: Day 4: Capsicum Fry

I love preparing Capsicum. It has this amazing green colour, which gives you the mental satisfaction of having consumed Green Vegetable. Also it is amenable to being part of different preparations including fried in isolation, fried along with Potatos (which gives it good aroma and texture), or fried with Onions and Tomato.

It takes very less time to cook. It is not demanding on you. It doesn't expect you to add it to the frying pan and stand there looking to see if it is burning or not, because it doesn't, you don't have to add water because it moisturizes itself.

It tastes good without cooking (as a salad) or cooked.

I love it.

Here is the recipe.

Ingredients

Capsicum, 3 medium ones, cut into small pieces
Potato, one, cut into small cubes
Onion, one medium sized, finely chopped
Tomato, two small ones or one medium one, finely chopped
Coriander Powder, one tea spoon
Haldi Powder, one teaspoon
Jeera Powder, one teaspoon
Red Chilly Powder, a pinch
Oil, two spoonfuls
Ginger, grated, half a table spoon
Garlic, two to three cloves, cut into small pieces.
Mustard, a pinch

Preparation

1. Heat Oil in a frying pan
2. Add mustard, saute till it splutters
3. Add onions and keep stirring till golden brown
4. Add tomatoes
5. Add Haldi Powder, Jeera Powder, Coriander Powder, Chilly Powder and Salt
6. Add Ginger
7. Saute the mix till combination starts shedding oil. You will be able to see small droplets of oil on the surface of the pan
8. Add Potato and Capsicum and mix thoroughly
9. Cook it in medium flame for about 10 minutes (You can check if Potato is cooked will by trying to cut it with the ladle. If it cuts easily, it means that potato has boiled properly, which means that the Capsicum also has cooked well.
10. Switch off the fire, top it with Coriander Leaves and keep it closed.

Capsicum Fry goes very well with almost any food but I love it with Chappath or Curd Rice.

Checkout google for benefits of Capsicum. I am too tired now.

30 Days, 30 Veggies: Day 3: Cabbage Poriyal

I find preparing Cabbage very messy. Cabbage is very demanding vegetable. It always need a partner. And also any South Indian Cabbage preparation requires grated coconut.

It is tedious to grate coconuts. Having been from the land of Kerala, which literally mean the 'Land of Coconuts'.I find the grated Coconut available off the shelf in Super Markets lacking in taste and aroma.

Neither will I grate coconuts, nor will I by it Off the Shelf. Talk of Dog in the manger and all that.

If it were not for the fact that I had decided to prepare one different vegetable every day, probably I would not have touched Cabbage with a barge pole.

As it happened, (these things always happen that way only !!) I had all the three ingredients to prepare Cabbage Poriyal, Cabbage, Green Peas and Grated Coconut.

So I said to myself, why not?

There is a Hindi saying, 'Kal kare tho Aaj, Aaj Kare tho Abb', which loosely translated means 'Do not procrastinate'. So, I asked myself, why not?

Here goes my recipe for the Cabbage Poriyal, which means Cabbage Fry. You can read the Tarla Dalal Recipe Here

Ingredients

Cabbage, thinly sliced, two cups
Green Peas, half a handful
Grated Coconut, a bit
Urad Dal, half a tea spoon
Mustard, a pinch
Jeera, a pinch
Curry leaves, a few
Green Chilly, one or two, slit
Salt to taste
Ginger, grated, half a spoon
Oil, a little bit
Haldi Powder, a pinch

Preparation

1. Sock the Green Peas overnight in water so that they are soft in the morning. 
2. Heat the frying pan and add oil
3. Once the oil heats up, add Jeera, Urad Dal , mustard and curry leaves and saute till mustard splutters completely
4. Add Cabbage, mutter, grated coconut, haldi powder, chilly slit, Salt and Ginger (basically dump all the rest) and cook in medium heat for about 10-12 minutes, occasionally stirring.
5. Poriyal is ready !!

It turned out to be better than I thought, There was a good mix of aromas. The aroma of grated coconut, Curry Leaves and Ginger, mixed together is very good.

Health Benefits of Cabbage

Cabbage has a lot of awesome benefits. It is an anti-oxidant which lowers cholesterol in the blood, it has anti-inflammatory properties, it prevents Cancer, it is good for the digestive tract etc. It's nutrients are better preserved if steamed rather than fried.

30 Days, 30 Veggies: Day 2: Carrot Fry

I like Carrot but I find it difficult to cook.

The problem is that when I was growing up, carrot was an exotic vegetable and was infrequently prepared at home. Carrot was also expensive. My mom used to make three different preparations with Carrot. One, Carrot Fry. Two, Carrot 'Kootu' and three, Carrot Sambar. I liked these recipes, but when it came to cooking Carrot, I could prepare only Carrot Fry and Sambar.

Yet to learn how to prepare 'Kootu'.

I will learn to, I  will learn to

I followed Tarla Dalal closely to prepare this preparation. I did not add 'Methi' since I wanted a Pure Carrot Subzi

Ms.Dalal asked us to cut the Carrots with the skin. She mentions that the peel contains fibre. I did not heed that advice. Having to cook carrot is one thing, but to keep the skin? No way.

(I took the peeled skin, washed it again and prepared Carrot Skin Soup. It was not delicious.)

Here is the recipe:

Ingredients

1. Carrot cubes (finely chopped): 2 Cups
2. Onions, finely chopped: 1/2 cup
3. Cumin Seeds: A bit
4. Oil: two spoonfuls
5. Ginger: Finely grated: A bit
6. 2-3 Garlic cloves
7. 1/2 spoon Haldi (Turmeric)
8. 1/2 spoon Coriander Powder
9. Salt to taste
10. Coriander Leaves a bit.

Preparation

1. Heat the oil in the pan. 
2. Add cumin seeds. wait till they splutter.
3. Add the onions and saute till they are golden brown
4. Add all the rest in the pan
5. Mix thoroughly
6. Heat in Low-Medium Heat for about 10 minutes till the carrots are soft
7. Switch off the heat, top it with Coriander leaves
8. Eat

Folks, the preparation turned out to be very tasty.

Day 2 over, 28 to go.

30 Days, 30 Veggies: Day 1: Beetroot Fry

I was never a big fan of Beetroot. I don't like the taste of Beet, I don't like the feeling of the vegetable in my mouth, I don't like the colour that the vegetables leaves on your hand and on your plate and everywhere else...

At least that is what I thought till I started preparing Beetroot Fry.

You might wonder why I purchases Beetroot when other vegetables were available. If you are asking this question, it means that you have not been following the daily news about the explosive prices of vegetables here in India. The prices change by the day. Since the expectation is that the price will fall over the next few days, the tendency is to buy the cheaper vegetables available on that day, that too in very less quantities.

Beetroot fitted the bill. Hence Beetroot, here I come.

Why Beetroot?

I couldn't have said it better

Recipe: This recipe is for people who cannot distinguish between their table spoons, tea spoons, sprigs and what else....This is for common man. Not an expert cook.

Ingredients:

1. Beetroot: 3 medium ones, cut into small cubes. 

2. Oil: Two Table Spoons

3. Mustard: a bit

4. Urad Dal: a little bit (Check out in Google for its English Name)

5. Ginger: Some, may be a piece as big as your thumb, grated (Ginger I mean, not you thumb)

6. A dash of Coriander Power and a pinch of Jeera (Cumin) powder and a bit of Haldi (Turmeric) Powder

7. A few curry leaves (5 or 6)

8. One or two green chillies, sliced

9. Salt to taste

10. Onion: One medium sized, chopped fine

12. Tomato: One medium sized, chopped fine

Preparation

1. Heat the oil in a Pressure Pan. 

2. Add the mustard and wait till it splutters, then add dal, Curry leaves and Chilly. 

3. Saute in medium heat for about a minute or two. 

4. Add the onion and stir till it turns golden brown

5. Add tomato, ginger, coriander powder, haldi powder and jeera powder and salt

6. Mix thoroughly

7. Once the oil starts coming out, add the beetroot

8. Cook it in pressure pan in medium flame for about 6-7 minutes or till two to three whistles

9. Cook in low heat for another three minutes

10. Once the steam condenses, open the pan mix thoroughly.

For better results, you can add a bit of lime and top it with coriander leaves for better aroma

My impressions.

First of all, try the above recipe at your own risk. Know your spice limit and add chilly accordingly. One good thing is that green chilly, though spicy, is good for health unlike red chilly. In case you don't like green chilly, you could try black pepper, though the colour may change a bit, the aroma will be better.

They say that Beetroot helps build muscles. So true. Though a tiny vegetable, Beetroot is a monster when it comes to being hard. My muscles ached as I struggled to cut the beetroot with a reasonably sharp knife. 

Even thought the vegetable is hard, once cooked it becomes delectably soft and almost like melts in the mouth. Also the flavor of the above combination is just awesome. 

What would I have done differently? None that I can think of. May be I would have added a bit of brown sugar (Gur) to lower the spice effect.

It was also good for the stomach and bowel movement. Naturally. It contains fibers also.

Now that I have eaten Beetroot, that too prepared by me, I am a big fan now. As soon as my thirty days of testing different veggies is completed, I am going to splurge on Beetroot with gay abandon.

I can't wait.

30 Vegetables in 30 Days:

Due to some peculiar circumstances (I found my servant lady stealing money and stuff, and I terminated her services), I am finding that I have to cook food on my own. Since I enjoy cooking, that is not a problem, even though cleaning after cooking is a bit tedious. 

Of course, I also enjoy cleaning the vessels and keeping kitchen neat and clean. So that is not a problem.

However the problem is that I have just about two hours in the morning to prepare breakfast, lunch and dinner. I prepare Dosa, Idli or Upma for breakfast, all are easy to cook and doesn't demand your constant presence in front of the fire. Dosa is nothing but South Indian Salted Pancake, Idli is Rice & Lentil Dumplings and Upma is.... Well, Upma is something.

I am not to talk here about Dosa, Idli or Upma. I am here to talk about Vegetables.

I prepare vegetables for both Lunch and Dinner. Since time is a constraint for me, I need to prepare Vegetables for both lunch and dinner in the morning itself. I prepare Veggies, take some to dinner and have the remaining for dinner. 

My vegetable preparation should meet the following four criteria.

1. The food should be palatable

2. The food should be cooked in fire. Salads do not count as vegetable preparation

3. Potato is not counted as a vegetable. Potato preparations, where Potato is the main ingredient, will not be considered

4. It should use only the following spices. Mustard, Jeera, Dhania Powder, Jeera Powder and Turmeric Powder.

5. The preparation should be healthy. Meaning, very less oil

6. The preparation should take less than 15 minutes

Some of you may say that I am talking about the ideal vegetable preparation, that this is not attainable

Let me try.

The other day, I was preparing Beetroot fry. That is when I hit upon this idea.

For the next month, I will prepare 30 different vegetables, one each day. I will write a blog post, for each vegetable preparation. I will write my emotions and feelings as I was preparing the food, I will write the recipe and I will also back link to the source recipe, if I have found the recipe in the web.

Please note that the recipes that I post in this blog are for men. Let me explain.

Women are naturally gifted with cooking skills, it is in their genes. They can easily navigate between table spoons, tea spoons, 5 mls, 10 mls, sprigs, splutter (as in mustard) etc. They also understand the difference between high heat, medium heat and low heat in the gas. Ladies also know the difference between Power Mode and Quick mode in microwave...

Difference between Tawa, Kadai, Ladle and Chipple? No  problem, they know.

Vegetables? Ladies know about all the vegetables in the world, I think. You know Cauliflower, Ladies finger, cabbage, tomato, onion...

Men also know all those vegetables. So there...

Ladies also know about multiple types of these vegetables. They know that there are at least three types of onions, Sambhar Onion, Pink Onion and White Onion. They prefer 'English' carrots to 'Desi' carrots.

Ladies also know about Jinga, Green Chilly long, Green Chilly Small, all kinds of Gourds - bitter, snake etc, yam, jinga, Kundru, arbi, Bartha Brinjal, Small Brinjal, long purple Brinjal, long green Brinjal, pumpkins...

Gosh...

Ladies also know of all spices in the universe. They know of Dhania, Jeera, Aamchur, Red Chilly, Kashmiri Red Chilly, Black Pepper, White Pepper, Garam Masala, Chai Masala...

(Sorry foreigners, I don't have the time to explain all these terms in English to you. Google the words that you do not understand.

Shall I tell you a secret? The fact is that I don't know)

They also know of exotic spices like Jalepano, Oregano, Olives etc. They really know !!!

Men are not like that. Other than the vegetables mentioned above, only thing they know is the difference between pinch, dash, whiff and dollop when it comes to solids and pint and quarter when it comes to liquids.

Which means....

that  the recipes for men should be simple and intuitive, as in teaching kids. That is what I strive to achieve in this project. I will demistify cooking in terms that men understand. 

I will also rank my preparations based on the taste. I will also try to provide the nutritional value of the preparation.

I have already completed three days and three different veggies, Beetroot, Carrot and Cabbage.

Wait for the further posts.

10 Principles of Conservatism....

I found this article very interesting.

As you know, there are two political parties in the United States, the Republicans and the Democrats. The philosophies of both these parties are founded on a set of core principles.

For conservatives, the bible is the 10 Commandments of a true Conservative, an article written by Russel Kirk.

Read the article here

One of the reasons why United States is able to adjust rapidly to changing times is that the philosophies of both parties are based on a set of core principles. Like the above.

When reading it, I wish we in India also had some such core principles or ideologies around which moderate people like me can coalesce. For example, what is the fundamental principle of Congress Party?. It has moved on from Pure Socialism to Capitalism without batting an eyelid.

The two ideology based parties in India are BJP and Communists. Both these ideologies are too strong and radical for me to digest. 

Some may say that it is good not to have principles that may bind us from reacting to swiftly changing times. However, we also cannot ignore the fact that without a principled ideology and philosophy, we cannot hope to encourage more people to take up public life. 

We are very lucky that we have a 5000 year old civilization with  set of principles and guidelines for behavior. What Carl Jung called 'Collective Unconscious' guides our principles / policies and even our day to day lives. Imagine what our life would have been if we were a young civilization like the United States with out any moral compass to guide us !!

I dread the thought !!

I am kinda naive...

Some people are naturally suspicious of people. I am not one of them. 

Those people who are suspicious of people, tend to parse words said by others. They are always able to find the hidden motives of people from the words they utter. They are easily able to link the events that occurred previously to the words being mentioned now. 

Take the case of my boss. He is the master at understanding how people behave. When one person quit my company, he called me up and told me to take care of some of the key people because they were close to the person who quit. (I know it is a bad example. Even I knew this). My boss knows that because X has joined the company, Y, a totally unrelated individual, is expected to quite very soon.

Another example. If an employee calls in sick, my boss knows if he is really sick or if he has taken leave to attend an interview. 

'Trust but Verify' is his motto.

As I said before, I am not like that.

I trust people and believe that they are inherently good. I think that people will tell and do the right thing, especially if I have known them for a long time.

Take the case of my driver. This incident started from about three weeks ago.

About a month ago, he informed me that he is leaving my work and will return to his native village for the job of a driver. He told me that Mumbai is very expensive and he is feeling lonely because his family is out there in the village. And very recently he had become the father of a baby girl.

How long will he stay as my driver?

Sir, I have to pay you back 4000 rupees. I will pay the same over the next two months and then leave.

I believed him.

About three weeks ago, he took about 4 days leave for Ganesh Puja, which is a very important festival in Maharashtra. He did not return on the 5th day. On about the 7th day he called me and informed me that he will need to extend his leave as his wife was sick. 

He returned after about 10 days, on 26th or so, very close to the pay day, which is the 30th.

I discussed with him as to when he will leave. He told me that he will pay back 4000, 2000 this month and 2000 next, and will leave. I believed him. Since he was going to stay with me for another month, I decided not to deduct the leave salary and paid him the entire amount of Rs.10000.

He promptly paid me 2000.

That night, he send me an SMS and informed me that he is going to his village and that he will not be available.

Ain't I naive?

Shouldn't I have cut his leave salary? I could have paid it along with his next month pay. This is what HR of any company does very regularly. 

I believed him when he said that he will pay back my entire amount and then leave. 

My boss would have linked the fact that he took an extended holiday in his village and that he had only his (my driver's) word that his wife was sick, and that he conveniently returned around the pay day.

These were huge clues. 

My boss would have deducted 10 days of pay. I didn't.

I am naive.

PS: Before he left, my driver identified another good driver for me. That is decent of him. He need not have done this. I think he felt guilty of cheating me.

I don't know. 

Fighting Cocks and Life Lessons from Navajo tradition......

At a weekly fair in a village,  lady observed that there was one man who was placing bets on the winning bird every week in the Cockfight competition.

"I see that you are able to place bet on the Winning bird all the time. How do you manage that? " She asked him.

"Both the fighting cocks belong to me", he replied.

"But how do you know which one will win this specific fight?", persisted the lady.

"The one that wins is the one that I feed during the week", replied the man. 

I remembered this story, when I was reading another story in one of the books that I was reading. This story is from Navajo tribe.

Grandfather is telling his Grandson, "Always there is a fight between two wolves in my mind"

"What are they?" asked the Grandson.

"One is the good wolf. It is the wolf of kindness, humility, respect, positive thoughts, laughter etc. The other is the bad wolf. It is the wolf of revenge, enmity, anger, rudeness, arrogance, hatred etc"

"Which wolf wins the fight?" asked the Grandson

"The wolf that wins is the wolf that I feed", replied the Grandfather.

At the Gym: Perspectives

I have been going regularly to the Gym almost every day for most of last year with nothing to show for it (as my wife will point out). As an observer of People, I see different kinds of patrons who come to the gym. Let me put it another way, people seem to be coming to Gym for various reasons.

Based on my observations, I am categorizing some of the people that I see regularly at the Gym.

1. The Calorie Digger: These guys hit the Gym each day with a target of consuming a pre-specified number of Calories. Like Gold Diggers (hence the term 'Calorie Digger' if you didn't understand already) these guys are on the lookout for ways to meet their calorie consumption targets. They are always found at the machines which show the Calorie consumed per step that they take. This means no weights, no pumping iron, no yoga...(none of which show calorie consumption)

For them, it is always a Calorie Countdown, like start off the day with 500 calories to be consumed, now down to  400...They are good at Math. 'I did 178 Calories on treadmill, 142 on Arc Trainer, that means what? 178+142=320 Calories. I have 180 Calories to Go'.  Their day is made when they achieve the day's target.

(PS: Yours faithfully fall into this group)

2. The Butterfly: For these guys, the entire Gym is a curiosity Shop and every day at the gym is a day of marvel. They flit from treadmill to treadmill, checking out one programmed routine after another. 'Mountain Biking' will be followed by 'Walk in the Park' followed by 'Hills and Valleys'. They will hardly spent any time at the routine. They will check their heart rate in the heart rate monitor to assure themselves that their heart is in the right place !. They will try all the weights, starting from 100 Kg and stabilizing at 15 Kg, they will do push ups, pull ups, squats, lunges, crunches.... you know, the works

They will not try anything for more than three minutes. Only satisfaction that they get is that they came to the Gym !!

3. Mountain Climbers: These are obese persons, mostly ladies, who infrequently come to the gym. However they are all enthusiasm the day they hit the Gym, their aim is to reduce 5 Kgs on that day. They will jump on to a treadmill, keep a speed of about 15 Kmph and an incline of about 10 (which is like climbing Himalayas on a Motorcycle). Most of them are potential heart patients. Fortunately for them, they get tired in no time and reduce the speed to 3 Kmph and incline to 0.

The tread on the mill for about 15 minutes, and then leave the gym, possibly to snack up on Calories in preparation for their next visit to the Gym.

4. The 'Full mooners': As the name implies, these guys and ladies are as (in)frequent as the Full Moon. They come once in a while, spend some time and then go. Not for them the axiom that 'Gym is best done regularly'

5. 'Value for Money' (VFM) explorers: For these guys, the primary motive in hitting Gym is Value for Money. 'I have paid X amount of money to join the Gym and Y amount of money additionally on Personal Trainers. Eventhough it is tough to get up in the morning and hit the Gym, the thought of all that money paid forces me to come'. These are also the guys who are most regular in the Gym. Unlike Calorie Diggers who watch the Calorie meters, these guys watch the Calendar to see when they will earn the full value for their money.

6. 'Weights' hunters: These guys are the exact opposite of 'Calorie Diggers'. For them the words 'Warm Up' do not mean anything. The moment they enter the Gym, the head for the 'Weights' Section. These guys are attracted to Weights like fish to water. Normally, these guys are well informed about all the muscles in the body and religiously and regularly work on various sets of muscles in the body. These guys really mean it when they use words like like 'Abs', 'Pectorals', 'Gluteal'....Sometimes one gets the impression that these guys are less interested in Muscle Building and more interested in standing in front of the mirror admiring their work.

7. The 'Team': The team Gyms in packs. The team is normally a couple or three of friends. They never hit the Gym alone. 'United we Gym, divided we rest' is their motto. Once in the Gym, the team breaks and recoups at the end of the session. 

8. The 'Couple': A special case of Team, a couple is usually husband and wife.There are two sub-categories in this group. For the 'Newly Weds', hitting a Gym is a part of doing things together romantically. The mister will showcase his sweat and miniature muscles to the Sweetheart, while the sweetheart will demonstrate her curves to her darling. All hunky dory. One gets the impression that if it were not for decorum and separate rooms for men and women, the 'Newly weds' would have wiped the sweat off each other !!

The other group is the 'Experienced'. In this sub category, the couple is middle aged, over worked and stressed. Most of the time the husband is abnormally obese and wife is plumb and pretty. Wife do not need a Gym. I think the wife just tags along to keep an eye on her hubby and ensure that he goes to Gym rather than raiding the nearest MacD.

Over a time, the visits by couple become few and far between. I think the marriage catches up in the end.

These are the major categories that one observes in the Gym. I also see that men and women treat Gym very differently. For men, Gym is the ultimate personal space. This is where they are in touch with their inner beings. Treadmill for them is a tool to plan for  the day ahead. 

For women, on the other hand, Gym is yet another bonding opportunity. It is often fascinating to watch two women effortlessly jog on the treadmill parallelly discussing their kids schooling and the latest recipe from Sanjeev Kapoor. 

The worst experience for a man in the Gym? To be walking on a treadmill, trying to marshall the thoughts and plan for the day, with two 'Bonding' women on the treadmills on either side. 

What has been your experience?